LIVING SEXY IS... A Silent Confidence

Karen is one of the most beautiful women I've ever met. Her presence is freeing and playful and because of her, I can finally grasp the meaning of disarming.

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On my latest trip to Denver, Colorado, I contacted Karen for this feature because there was no way she'd be able to run away from me again before I took pictures of her. Since meeting her a few months back in New York, I'd been yearning for a chance to turn the lens around on her (she's a fellow photographer!) so she could see just how gorgeous she is to the world. 

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I was even more excited to record our interview because there's no shortage of laughter when I'm around Karen. I had to cut a lot of it out because I didn't want to take up too much of your time with our silliness, but if you have a few minutes, I encourage you to listen to our interview above to witness for yourself the depth and softness of Karen's heart. 

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karenscheffe.boudoirbytutti.tuttidelmonte

All the women I've featured have brought such vulnerability and light to this subject of living sexy, and Karen was no different. We spoke about this idea of confidence, and how if it's tied to the wrong - material - things, it won't have as big of impact in your outer persona as it would when it's tied to what's within. Namely, who we really are. 

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"When you have taken time to process the reasons you are who you are and the things that you believe in, you become sure-footed in all facets of life... and exuding that through confidence is sexy."

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karenscheffe.boudoirbytutti.tuttidelmonte
karenscheffe.boudoirbytutti.tuttidelmonte
karenscheffe.boudoirbytutti.tuttidelmonte

Digging deep is scary! The results of knowing yourself, though, truly outweigh any initial fear. Through my yoga training and other leadership workshops I've participated in, the common thread is this idea of getting to know yourself in order to fully be the person you were meant to be. From where you come from to how you react to situations presently, it's all part of who we are. Karen nailed it in the head when she said that it's asking ourselves, "Who Am I In This Space?" that can bring us clarity in how we move through life. 

It's not the first time (nor do I expect it to be the last) the word "confidence" shows up tied to the word "sexy." Do I think to be sexy you must be confident? Absolutely. Do I think confidence is the only way to achieve this so-called "sexy lifestyle"? Not necessarily. What I DO think is vital in this discussion, however, is knowing yourself fully. As scary as it might be, asking yourself these questions might start to skim the edges of discovering what's inside:

What do I want from life?

Who am I without the titles?

Who are the people I currently surround myself with and what does that say about me?

How am I pursuing my dreams? 

What is my vision for the world?

What value do I bring to the world and how can I continue to improve?

What qualities do I need to work on?

What do I love about myself?

How can I become more of who I want to be? 

These are just some of the questions I've personally tackled this year. In trying to be as specific as possible (because that's the only way this game works), I noticed I was falling short on some of the answers. For instance, I had not really thought about what my vision for the world was because I was too caught up thinking of my individual path. Once I tied together WHAT my dreams were and WHY I was passionate about them, it unveiled my very own vision for the world! Simply knowing that every little thing I do is tied to all of humanity and, ultimately, to the world, my sense of purpose and drive was renewed and re-energized.

Knowing is freaking sexy.

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karenscheffe.boudoirbytutti.tuttidelmonte
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karenscheffe.boudoirbytutti.tuttidelmonte

A huge thank you to Karen for sparking this conversation in me and all who are reading. You're a light to the world, a vision of a woman and an inspiration to others. Keep shining, dreaming and dancing. 

Much, much love to you, beautiful soul.

Tutti

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karenscheffe.boudoirbytutti.tuttidelmonte
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karenscheffe.boudoirbytutti.tuttidelmonte

Here's the video so you fall in love with Karen even more:


 / / C R E D I T S / / 

Featured: Karen Scheffe

Location: Denver, Colorado

Photography and Video by: Boudoir by Tutti




LIVING SEXY IS... Grace and Freedom

In order to begin this post in the most meaningful way, I decided to look up the meaning of the name Francesca. After visiting a handful of unhelpful sites that basically summed up the name in three words, "woman from France," (geeee, thanks!), I decided to click on the third link in my Google Search. You see, I have this thing that I don't usually click on the first few sites that appears on the search list because I want to give the underdogs a break by helping to pump up their SEO (go team go!). All tech-talk joking aside, I'm so glad I clicked, because it gave me the only fun meaning to the name Francesca: the free one. 

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Francesca is a simple woman to describe, not because she's "basic," but because she's natural. She's grounded in who she is, while being able to have a spirit that seems to almost float beside you. Her beauty is one that captures people's attention in a double-look kind of way. Her easygoing  and go-with-the-flow demeanor is juxtaposed by a fiery side that'll push you to dance till 6am. 

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boudoir.photography.sexy.tuttidelmonte.nyc

She's the type of woman who makes cooking a 4-course meal look effortless.

She's the type of woman who's just as comfortable wearing a skin-tight red dress as she is rocking a bohemian look. 

She's the type of woman who brings you sunflowers when she goes to the market.

She's the type of woman who's home you walk into and you immediately feel a sense of calm. 

She's the type of woman who isn't afraid to smile as a stranger compliments her.

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boudoir.photography.sexy.tuttidelmonte.nyc
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Francesca goes through life with an unspoken grace about her that leaves a trail of femininity, light and freedom. 

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"I don't feel connected with the world if I'm not connected with myself."

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boudoir.photography.sexy.tuttidelmonte.nyc

She mentions her mother a lot, crediting her as the source of inspiration behind going through life with grace and intention. Throughout her life, her parents played a strong role in encouraging her to ask deeper questions within herself, to get to know herself as a woman and to not be afraid of observing prior to acting. This mindful way of living has shaped Francesca into a woman who's totally OK when something's off. 

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"I have the same battles all women go through... You have to feel the downs to feel the ups, and the ups are the moment you're set free."

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This idea of freedom came up toward the end of our interview (way before that web site listed her name as "the free one"!), and I'm so happy Francesca mentioned it, because it's the perfect way to complete a proper description of who she is: she's GRACEFUL and she's FREE.

(cue: Miss Congeniality pageant song, "she's beauty and she's grace, she's Miss United States, blah blah blah)

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"Freedom is a thing that I also live by: always having an open heart and an open free spirit." 

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In its most basic sense, Francesca says that at its core, grace stems from love and it can be expressed through the body, through different ways of being, ways of existing, etc.

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boudoir.photography.sexy.tuttidelmonte.nyc

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"Anywhere from career to work to love to sex to anything, I think carrying a life with grace is the sexiest thing a woman can really carry with her."

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So, friends, here's to a life of grace, of freedom and of tons of sexiness.

Until next week!

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Here's a sneak peak behind-the-scenes!


LIVING SEXY IS... Connecting To Others

This one is a particularly challenging woman to intro to with as much oomph as she naturally carries.

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Eve is a brilliant artist, who’s blessed with quick wit, a tender heart and an intense connection with herself as a woman. The latter may be seen as a curse, as being a woman comes with a lot of FEELINGS, some magnificent, some painfully destructive.

But emotions, the ups, the downs, the good, the bad, etc. allow us to connect to others on a multidimensional level. 

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“It takes some level of chore in your life to actually evoke these emotions sometimes. So for anyone who wants to get close to that, I’d say to them… FEEL.” - Eve

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Coming from the world of fashion and beauty, Eve has spent many years in an industry that defines beauty and sexiness using mostly visual aesthetics. But, as time and life will have it, she now sees a complete different side of it.

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"As an adult, the more I transcend the idea of an aesthetic in itself and look at what feels right, the closer I can connect to my emotions, the sexier I feel… It’s not something visual, it’s not even something physical, it’s about connections. It’s about connections to other people.” - Eve

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boudoir.newyork.photography.tuttidelmonte

This is coming from the same woman who started the interview stating that "eating copious amounts of watermelon, alternating that with masturbating and watching old reruns of the X-files on a Friday night alone” is what comes to mind when she hears the word sexy. You see why I love her? 

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“Perhaps there isn’t such a rigid definition for what sexy is. You start to develop your own idea for what is beautiful, what is authentic, what is natural; and whatever IS natural, becomes the sexiest things there is.” - Eve

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boudoir.newyork.photography.tuttidelmonte

This woman and her natural and unforgiving way of being truly inspired me during this process. I love seeing people dig deep into their spirit and shed the layers that don’t serve them anymore. The protective walls we build inside protect us from getting hurt, sure, but they also impede us from fully connecting to others in the most intimate ways. It’s so humbling to see someone’s soul bare and willing to feel. So I thank you, Eve, for being as courageous as you are and challenging me to not be afraid to feel more. 

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boudoir.newyork.photography.tuttidelmonte
boudoir.newyork.photography.tuttidelmonte

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"The more you connect to humanity as a concept, that really is the sexiest thing, because the most integral, the most grounded, the most vital thing that you can possibly connect to is the emotional shared appreciation between all living beings.” - Eve

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boudoir.newyork.photography.tuttidelmonte
boudoir.newyork.photography.tuttidelmonte

I couldn't resist the urge to film this beauty during our shoot. I hope you enjoy it!



// C R E D I T S

Video by Tutti del Monte

Featured: Eve Ainsbury

Music by Mikky Ekko, "Pull Me Down"

Location: Williamsburg, Brooklyn